The Genocide of the Preps
by Damry Hawke
Summary: Vegeta and Goku have finally come to the aid of the anti-preps! And of course, the hero always gets the guy!


Disclaimer~  
  
I don't own Vegeta or Goku (although I want Vegeta to be  
  
mine...cough...). This is completely made up. I don't mean to offend anyone  
  
by this. I know that there are some nice preps, I just have yet to meet one!  
  
Fair enough?  
  
One day Erin was sitting in her Spanish class listening to Sra. Errickson  
  
drone on about preterites or whatever. She was busy staring at Jeff, the  
  
really hott guy that sits next to her. He plays lacross...and gives her  
  
100's on her homework, even if she didn't do it. Anyway, this really  
  
annoying Freshman, Eric Johnson (I promise this is a real kid, not  
  
Trunks...), kept stealing her pen and it was really pissing her off. She  
  
thought about shooting a ki blast at his head, but knew it would never happen  
  
because her power level is like in the negatives or something. Pretty  
  
pathetic indeed.  
  
Then, just as Sra. Errickson started doing the "Spanish Speaking  
  
Countries" dance, the back door exploded and sent fragments of schrapmil into  
  
Eric's eyes. Bastard Freshman! While Eric was screaming and bleeding, two  
  
really weird looking men walked in. One was munching on a gross cafeteria  
  
hot dog made from last month's meat loaf that was made from last year's  
  
chicken nuggets that was made from who knows what! The other had his arms  
  
crossed and had really spikey hair.  
  
Erin screamd, but Jeff held her tightly to protect her from the strange  
  
men. The one eating the hot dog peered into the classroom. "Did you really  
  
have to blow up the door?" he asked the one with the spikey hair.  
  
"Shut up, Kakkarot." The man walked into the class and looked over the  
  
preppy girls and jocks. "Weaklings...hmmph..."  
  
"Weaklings? I'll have you know that Plano West won the state  
  
championships in tennis this year!" one of the jocks announced.  
  
"Tennis? Ha! You hear that, Kakkarot? We're up against some tennis  
  
champs here! What are you gonna do, beat me with a racket while wearing  
  
knee-highs and a skirt? What you pathetic preps don't understand is that no  
  
matter mow much Abercrombie or Bebe there is in your closet, no matter how  
  
much makeup you cake your face with, no matter how many state championships  
  
you win or tests you ace, there will always be someone smarter, faster, or  
  
prettier than you. In a sense, you're all just as ugly and stupid as the  
  
next person. Are you all following me?"  
  
The students were speechless. A few of them blinked, but the others were  
  
frozen. One little Freshman girl wearing a mini-skirt and XXI shirt tugged  
  
on her boyfriend's shirt. "I don't like them, Reid! Go beat them up!"  
  
Reid, another Freshman (that's right, my entire Spanish class is full of  
  
Fish), looked around at his friends who all encouraged him. Giving into the  
  
peer pressure, he stood up. Vegeta looked at him and laughed. "What are  
  
you, a football player?"  
  
"Yeah! And you're about to get your ass kicked! You think you can just  
  
walk into our class when we were just about to start singing the Spanish  
  
Countries song? Well you've got the wrong idea, you ass munching, butt  
  
licking, homosexual retard!"  
  
"Yeah!" the other students cheered. Erin and Jeff exchanged embarassed  
  
looks. Being the only two sensible Sophmores in the class, they were ashamed  
  
that their lower-classmen were so...dumb!  
  
Vegeta and Goku had to laugh. Without wasting another second, Vegeta  
  
shot a ki blast at Reid. Reid blew up into a million pieces, splattering  
  
blood all over the girls. They screamed and ran into the bathroom to wash  
  
up, ignoring the fact that their "friend" just got blown up.  
  
Erin took it upon herself to stand up, much to Jeff's dismay. He stood  
  
up beside her, not wanting the men to blow her up too. "You two can blow up  
  
our door, but you can't take the life of my classmate! Even if he was a  
  
stupid Freshman!"  
  
Vegeta looked her over. She had her hair up in a pony and wore sweat  
  
pants and a cheap tank, probably from Super Target. She wore no makeup and  
  
had on flip flops that she got at Payless for $5. "She's got spunk," Vegeta  
  
whispered to Goku. Goku nodded. "What makes you think that I won't blow you  
  
up just like I blew up that other weakling?"  
  
"Well, you could try to blow me up!" Erin challenged.  
  
"Erin, be careful! You don't want to mess with these guys!" Jeff  
  
cautioned. It's not that he was afraid of them or a wuss or anything, he  
  
just didn't want Erin to get hurt because he's soooo sweet and nice and  
  
thoughtful...  
  
"As much as I'd like to, I think I'll keep you around. You and your  
  
little boyfriend there seem to be the only sane ones in this class!" Vegeta  
  
couldn't help but snicker at Sra. Errickson who was desperately trying to  
  
file out the students. She was wearing a sombrerro and some  
  
really...really...frightening clothes. Soon, only Erin, Jeff, Vegeta, and  
  
Goku remained. "Why do you stay, woman? You could be safe and sound with  
  
those pathetic Freshman and that ridiculous teacher of yours!"  
  
"Because I'm not going to let you get away with killing Reid! As much as  
  
I hate him, he was still a person, and he didn't do anything wrong! Well,  
  
not anything wrong enough to kill him, anyway! You'll pay for what you did!"  
  
"Oh, and you really think you can stop us? We're Saiyans!"  
  
"Say-what?" Jeff asked, obviously confused.  
  
"Jeff, honey, sit down before you hurt yourself." Jeff did as he was  
  
told. "Now, "Saiyans", why are you here?"  
  
Goku was feeling a bit sick from the hot dog, so he went outside. Vegeta  
  
leaned against the wall and grinned. "Kakkarot and I came to destroy the  
  
race of preps. It seems there is an over-population of them in Plano, and  
  
they are multiplying so fast they are about to take over! They must be  
  
defeated!"  
  
"So...you're gonna kill the preps?"  
  
"Well, yeah!"  
  
"Score! Can I help?"  
  
"Of course! You can help us...tell us where they hang out, you know..."  
  
"Just don't blow up the Lacross field, okay?" Jeff asked, still trying to  
  
decide what was going on. He was cute, but not that bright.  
  
"Jeff, I want you to go home, okay? I have a feeling this is gonna get  
  
ugly and I don't want you to get hurt. I'm gonna go with these nice men!"  
  
"Be careful, okay? I wouldn't know what to do if something happened to  
  
you...I know I've never really told you this or anything, but I've always  
  
kind of...admired you! Well, what I'm trying to say is, if we make it  
  
through this, maybe we can catch a movie or something..."  
  
Erin smiled. "That sounds like fun! You have my number, right?"  
  
"Oh puh-lease!" Vegeta complained. "I came here to kill preps, not play  
  
Love Connection! Now let's go!"  
  
Erin gave Jeff a peck on the cheek and walked out of the huge hole in the  
  
wall with Vegeta. Goku was still hunched over, looking a bit green. "Oh  
  
man, you didn't actually eat the hot dog, did you?"  
  
Goku swayed on his feet, almost falling over. "I ate them all..."  
  
"Oh my God, we have to get you to a hospital to get your stomach pumped!"  
  
Vegeta rolled his eyes. "There's no time! I'll pump his stomach!"  
  
Vegeta walked over to the dizzy Goku and punched him in the stomach. Goku's  
  
eyes widened as he ran over to a trash can and threw up the assorted animal  
  
bits. Erin shuddered.  
  
"Thanks, Vegeta!" Goku said, wiping his mouth. His face was back to its  
  
normal color and he was smiling again.  
  
"Whatever. Now, let the carnage begin! We'll start by blowing up the  
  
school."  
  
Vegeta aimed a ki blast at Shepton, but Erin grabbed his arm before he  
  
fired. "No! Wait! There are innocent people in there! Let me clear out  
  
the fine arts halls!"  
  
"Ugh, fine. But hurry!"  
  
"Jesus, Vegeta! Lighten up! We're just here to kill preps, not cool  
  
people!"  
  
"I'm not opposing, am I? I just want to get this job done so I can go  
  
home and take a bath!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Never mind."  
  
While Vegeta and Goku were bickering, Erin ran into the band hall and  
  
told Mr. Lambert and Ms. Barker what was going on. They quickly told the  
  
students that there was an emergency marching rehersal outside on the  
  
football field and went outside. She did the same for Orchestra and Theatre,  
  
but decided that the world could do without a select few of the choir  
  
members.  
  
Soon, Erin had cleared out every non-prep in the school, including those  
  
who weren't involved in any fine arts program. She even told some of the  
  
preps that were to stay inside. She also had all the cool teachers come  
  
outside, but left teachers like Sra. Zack and Mrs. Blakely inside. There was  
  
such an accumulation of preppiness inside the school that it began to shake.  
  
Outside, the non-preps could feel the prepiness ooze out of the school and  
  
begin taking over them. A few in the front suddenly had the urge to go  
  
shopping at Abercrombie and spend their daddy's money. A couple even started  
  
walking away to go quit their jobs and ask their dad for their credit card.  
  
"Hurry, Vegeta! Blow it up before it takes over all of us!" To Erin's  
  
horror, Goku and Vegeta were taking turns brushing each other's hair and  
  
fixing their lip gloss. Vegeta was even wearing glitter!  
  
"No! Not you, too! I guess it's up to me to destroy the preps before  
  
they get me, too!" Erin observed the shaking high school. It seemed as if  
  
the slightest touch would cause it to burst. That gave her an idea! "Jeff!  
  
I need to borrow your lacross stick!"  
  
Jeff was shielding his eyes from the bright light pouring out of the  
  
school. It was the reflection of the lights hitting all the glitter being  
  
worn by the girls! He handed her the lacross stick and stood behind her,  
  
holding her waist so she wouldn't be blown away. Erin launched the stick at  
  
the school. At impact, the walls shot out in a huge burst of energy. Bricks  
  
and debris flew everywhere. Jeff shielded Erin from the flying dust and  
  
wreckage. Once the dust settled, not a single prep was left standing. The  
  
students in the parking lot were released from their trance, and Vegeta was  
  
scolding Goku for trying to put lip gloss on him.  
  
"Well done, Teater," Vegeta and Goku congratulated. "We sure could use  
  
you and Jeff in our efforts to destroy preps in schools all over the  
  
country!" "Jeff and I would love to help, but right now, we have a movie  
  
to catch!"  
  
Vegeta nodded and Goku winked at Jeff and gave him a thumbs up. Jeff  
  
nodded and grinned pimpishly. He took Erin's hand and led her away from the  
  
wreckage.  
  
Vegeta was busy trying to get the lip gloss off when he accidently tasted  
  
some of it. "Hmmm...what is that, Kakkarot? Strawberry?"  
  
"Yeah! And I've got watermelon, blueberry, and fruit punch!"  
  
"Oooo, I'll try the fruit punch!"  
  
"Oh yeah, that looks great on you, Vegeta! Goes great with your  
  
complexion! Really brings out your eyes!"  
  
"Really? Aww, you're too sweet!"  
  
THE END! 


End file.
